The Aftermath of a Binge

I’m usually on point with my calorie intake. Sometimes though, I just feel insanely indulgent and insatiable and it’s really, really stressful.

“God I wanna eat this no but I shouldn’t but I reeeeally want to maybe I can have a bite or a small serving but shit what if I can’t hold myself back and need to have a whole serving but I don’t have enough calories left for the day wait but if I only have a little nibble the craving will go away but I know myself and if I have a little I’ll want a lot but maybe I can hold myself back just this once no you know better than that just hold out a little longer but GOD DAMN I REALLY WANT IT!”

Rinse and repeat a billion times per second.

I’ve learned that it’s easier to eat whatever (and how much ever) I want for a day or two, kill the urge by overloading it, and get back on the wagon looking only a tad more plump than I’d like. By the end of it, the stress of an insatiable craving and the endless war in my mind subsides. For now. đŸ™‚

The most important part for me (and something I’m pretty proud of) is that I’ve learned to understand what my body is saying to me, and I’ve learned to actually listen.

I can’t say I’d recommend this to anyone else, but this is what works for me. Though I guess many people have cheat days. Anyway, it helps keep me sane and when I wake up plump, bloated and swollen, it resolidifies my goal. It makes me wanna work that much harder so that I don’t have to feel as plump as I do today, everyday.

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